So You Forgot Mother’s Day…

You forgot Mother’s Day. It’s not like we warned you, right? Oh wait, yeah we did. Whatever, what’s done is done. Doubtlessly you fumbled your way through some pitiful excuse involving a car wreck and a hurt dog…but the damage is already done.

Can you make your way back to Golden Child status? Probably not. But you may be able to get her to start looking you in the eyes again at family functions.

Step 1 – Mend Fences

Remember that fence you blew up with your model rocket all those years ago? Well now would be a great time to actually fix it. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s time to move out of the basement. I know, I know, you’re only 27, but still… At this point, you moving out could be the best belated Mother’s Day gift a mother could ask for.

You were a much better son when you were a kid

Step 2 – Keep The Pressure On

Sick of your brother Dan stealing the spotlight with his shiny BMW and pretty blonde wife? Well now is the time to shine.  Why not turn this Mother’s Day debacle into something positive? Make it Monday brunch. Or Tuesday; since you’re probably busy Monday.  The important thing to remember is that the crowds will be gone and you can really get down to business–how you’re still a great son.

Don’t forget to bring a spectacular Mother’s Day gift that you can calmly explain you didn’t want her to open in front of everyone. What kind of gift? We don’t know – that’s where you’ve gotta do some of the legwork.  Now if you’re talking Father’s Day gifts… then we may have one or two epic man gifts for dad.

Step 3 – Finish the Fight

Don’t let up yet, though. Go BIG. Bring a puppy (or a kitten, I don’t know your mom) to breakfast with an oversized bow around its neck. Buy her a car. If the gesture is grandiose enough, she’ll stop wondering why you forgot Mother’s Day and start wondering why her other son Dan is such an relentless failure.

And you’ll be free to forget Mother’s Day for another few years.

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